President Dick.

Bush is having a colonoscopy this morning. He'll be sedated for a couple of hours, so that puts Dick in charge of the Free World for a little while. How many of his friends can he shoot in the face in that time? What's the record?

I could say something crude and disrespectful at this point, like: "I'm sure they'll find out that Bush is full of shit and no matter how far they go in, there's no brain to be found." But that would just be cruel.

Oh wait... how can Dick become president? He's not part of the Executive Branch. He's the Dick Branch, the fourth branch of the government.