Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Pet Peeve: Too much weather info.

The other day, we were driving to the mall and I made some comment, about a driver or SUV or something. I could hear LWC roll her eyes by the sound of the pregnant pause, and I said by way of explanation, "Sorry, it's a pet peeve." Implying that there was a short list of peeves that I was allowed to bitch about more than I should. Anyway, here's another one.

Weather technology has reached the point where the guy on TV can tell me what the temperature is on my front porch and the front porch that belongs to the guy across the street. Like the atomic bomb, this is technology that we CAN use but we should NOT use.

Years ago, I thought it was funny that Chicagoland gives two or three temperatures for the day. It's because of the lake, and the effect it has on temperature. Same here in Virginia Beach because of the ocean. Okay, that's fine, but things have gotten out of hand. We often get separate tempatures for Chesapeake and Virginia Beach, and they're really not big enough or far enough apart to worry about this kind of thing. I think they give all these temperatures in case you live in a tiny armpit lovely community off to the edge (like Pungo), you can get mentioned on TV. Woot! Yeah, Pungo! We rock!

It's hot today in the Tidewater Hampton Roads area. Hellishly, heat indexily hot. Twice in one half hour on the TV news, Stupid Weather Guy Jon Cash gave 27 different heat indexes for today, ranging from 115 to 118, with most about 115. "Chesapeake 115, Virginia Beach 117," like I'm going to say, "Man! 115 sounds much less fatal, I'll drive the four miles to Chesapeake today and maybe somehow I'll live through this."

After all, these are just predictions. It's like astrology. You will meet a tall, dark, sweaty stranger today. What if the heat index is 116 instead of the 117 he predicts today? Can I sue him? Or is this like my stock broker, "Well, I thought that stock would go through the roof, sorry." If I was wrong as often as weather guys were wrong, I'd get fired. If I had a job, that is. Sorry I didn't post yesterday, too depressed.

4 comments:

Kathy said...

The weather report here, especially the guy you mentioned, is sort of a white guy's 'shout out'.

I think they should just say, "Everybody in Pungo say heeeeeeaaaay."

("Heeeeaaay!")

And be done with it.

Kathy said...

No, no Pungoloids here. It's close, though. That's where we ride.

thisismarcus said...

LOL Shocho, on so many levels...

It's like astrology. You will meet a tall, dark, sweaty stranger today.

Sorry, I was busy all day today.

Shocho said...

Marcus: Maybe that stranger was YOU!

Joe: Gallagher used to have a bit that went like this:

Gallagher: If you yell out your astrological sign, I will tell you something about yourself.

Crowd: Pisces! (or whatever is yelled out first)

Gallagher: Pisces! First to yell out in every crowd.

(Note: This was before Gallagher II.)